For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Monkey.
Gorilla Warfare


Monkeys with Guns. Do not go near unless you are Chuck Norris or a Illogicopedia regular contributor. Or if you have a bigger gun Or....
Monkey mad! Find monkey bananas. NOW!

Monkey monkey monkey, must be funky, in a Richard Attenborough world

~ IllogiABBA

Be careful, lest the monkey bananaslice you in anger. Oof eef eerf ook aah me mee moo meep moop.

MONKEYS ARE ANIMALS, so let them know it's Xmas time AGAIN!

Feed the world people.

Monkeys are small, mostly harmless primates, ranging in size from just under two feet to roughly half the size of a skyscraper. They are most-well known for throwing feces, plotting to Take Over the World and masturbating in front of children in zoos (and unlike other primates, they are legally allowed to do this). Monkeys are born from an Egg on a Dog top, are Funky and never stop, know every Magic trick under the sun, to please the Gods and everyone and have some Fun. Recent studies also show that Monkeys are, infact, flammable, but only kittens can be huffed.